Starting Eleven European, World Soccer Blog Random Thoughts:

Mr. Tevez married up

Here's another edition of Random Thoughts; no I don't have anything else to write about. Deal with it.

• Um Carlos Tevez, please go away. Go play in Brazil. Go play in Italy. Go play in Argentina. Go play with yourself. You've become tiresome and a punchline. Your wife and kids don't like England, then make a call for chrissakes. Tell them to stay put in Argentina and cash the direct-deposits, or suck it up and move to Europe. Otherwise, I'm pretty much done with your whining. Play ball, score goals, make money and shut up. KTHXBYE.
• And as for you Neymar. Call me when you've done something. Is there a bigger bust in the making than this Brazilian wonder boy? the kid might have all the skills necessary to be Brazil's next No. 10, but his runaway ego and immaturity will retard all progress until he gets his requisite reality check. Get in line next to Mr. Tevez and shut up.
• How hilarious is Mario Balotelli's attempted backheel goal this weekend against the LA Galaxy. Talk about arrogance. Talk about stupidity. Talk about blatant disregard for your opponent and the people in the stands who paid good money to see your team play. And don't tell me he's just 20 and can be forgiven. No way. Roberto Mancini is my new hero for pulling this Rhodes Scholar seconds after this example of the worst kind of grandstanding. Sit down next to Tevez and Neymar and shut up; don't give Mancini lip either. You were wrong. Next.
• Hope Solo is apparently going to win my informal poll--top right--about the Women's World Cup's biggest star. I like Hope. I think Hope is America's best female keeper. But Abby Wambach, who is currently second in the poll, is the best player on that team and delivered when it mattered most. That's what stars do. Abby made her PKs. Abby scored every time the U.S. needed a goal. That's a leader. That's a legend. Hope has some catching up to do.
• Selfish time: Sporting Clube de Portugal has thrown in the towel and abandoned its philosophy of going with home-grown, young talent and has gone out and signed a truckload of foreign players to play for new coach Domingos Pacienca. They've scored a bunch of goals against a bunch of bad teams. They had their way with Juventus Saturday in Toronto. They're a threat for second in Portugal. What? Wait? I said this last year too after they blasted their way through the preseason and won that cockamamie tournament here in the U.S. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. Check in with me around Christmas time on just exactly who is the fool.
• I love the summer friendly season here in the U.S.; look at who's on tour right now in the continental 48 and Canada: Real Madrid; Manchester United; Manchester City; Juventus; Sporting; Clube America; CD Guadalajara; and Barcelona. Best part is that these teams are banging out stadiums across the country; big stadiums too. More than 50,000 for Revs-United; Philly-Real Madrid drew huge numbers as did Galaxy-Madrid. Don't tell me there isn't a hardcore soccer audience in America. We'll come for a good product. Listening MLS? Get off the franchise model; build your clubs stadiums; get on the world calendar; get rid of playoffs; integrate all your smaller leagues and create relegation and promotion. Do it.
• In breaking news: FIFA is still corrupt. ...I personally cannot wait for next summer's Euro. It's better than the World Cup, just sayin ... How much is ESPN going to hype Saturday's ManU-Barca friendly as a Champions League rematch, and how much are real football fans going to snicker ...  That said, if I had a ticket, I wouldn't toss it out of bed ...  The U17 World Cup was pretty awesome; I just may have to watch some of the U20 World Cup coming up ... Kinda pissed Copa America wasn't available on my cable network ...  Let's take a run at this: Champions of European leagues for 2011-2012: England - ManU; Spain - Barcelona; Portugal - Porto; Germany - Leverkusen; Italy - Milan. Damn that looks familiar.

Starting Eleven European, World Soccer Blog Random Thoughts:

Temryss Lane

Regular readers know--and love--the semi-regular Starting Eleven Football Blog Roundup. That's a collection of bits and pieces collected from football blogs around the world. Today I'm introducing a new feature called Random Thoughts. It's a collection of bits and pieces of football thoughts collected from my cavernous brain. Basically, it's a crutch I'll lean on when I have nothing else to write about. Enjoy.

• Wait! What? Didier Drogba has malaria? Seriously? Is this stuff contagious? I guess not since you catch if from mosquitoes. May I suggest one of those propane-powered mosquito killers? Or a net? Or some Off? Sheesh.
• Liverpool beats Chelsea, wins four in a row, I write a post somewhat sarcastically suggesting that Liverpool might just be on its way back, considering a cupcake schedule coming up. And what do I get? Grief. 
• And yeah, I screwed up: Liverpool is NOT undefeated since the Red Sox took ownership of the club and Anfield. They lost the Mercyside Derby a couple of days after the acquisition was announced. Mea Culpa. Grief, part 2. Jackasses.
• Speaking of Liverpool, I put forward that Sporting Lisbon is the Liverpool of Portugal--minus of course all those European Cups. Only Sporting can puke all over its own shoes when it has a chance to take possession of second place after starting the season near the relegation zone. Only Sporting can piss away a 2-0 lead in such game and lose 3-2. Only Sporting is this maddening. Oh yeah, don't forget to stomp all over Lille again in your next Europa League game.
• Keeping it in Portugal, I'm taking great simultaneous joy and restraint in Porto's unbelievable 5-0 win over Benfica in the Portuguese classico last weekend. So typical of Portuguese football; Benfica, so brilliant a year ago, couldn't wait to sell off its best players and now they're a shell of their 2009 championship team. Sad really, sad.
• Derbies or Classicos: Aside from Sporting-Benfica, I'll take the classicos every time. No need to go further than Real Madrid-Barcelona.
• Anyone notice that Real Madrid has yet to lose in LaLiga, has a goal differential of 22 and is running away with a difficult Champions League group. Tell me again how Jose Mourinho isn't the best manager in the world? 
• Speaking of Derbies, I'll take City this weekend. Just sayin...
• Who's in the MLS playoffs again? LA, Dallas, Colorado and San Jose? Who again is in the Eastern Conference? 
• Gotta love ESPN's overly dramatic Outside the Lines piece yesterday on the U.S. Women's team's do-or-die game last night against Costa Rica.A U.S. loss would have eliminated them from World Cup qualification. The U.S. wins 3-0 and heads to a two-game playoff against Italy where chances are it will stomp all over Italy and waltz into the World Cup. Someone wake Brandi Chastain.
• David Beckham might be hosting Saturday Night Live soon? Yay. Maybe Posh will float on her big inflated boobs over the audience like the Goodyear blimp providing aerial views.
• Anyone subscribe to the World Football Daily podcast? I miss the free one. Haven't heard it since they went to the pay model. Would love some feedback whether you think it's worth it.
• Anyone notice that Fox Soccer Channel nuked their Monday night talk show? Probably not since no one watched it to begin with. Trust me, I sat through one episode and it was embarrassing. The host doesn't know football from throwball and the conversation was inane. Aside from the lovely Temryss Lane, the thing was unwatchable. Bring back Steven Cohen and anyone else--besides Wynalda.